Don't you always wonder what it feels like to die?  What it looks like and if heaven is actually real?  It's kind of scary.

About the tooth fairy:

Oh I get it, she gives them to God and then God can make another person.  Or maybe she keeps them as a souvenir and lets God make his own teeth.

You're so lucky you got to hug me!  (Looking at a baby picture)  Look at the joy lighting up my eyes!

It doesn't matter if E doesn't invite me to his Skylander's party.  Who cares if my friends have a great time without me.  I have giraffe.  Giraffe and I always have a blast together.  I love him more than my friends anyway.  I don't even care. I don't feel left out.

You know what I am worried about right now?  What if there is a fire in the school?  Our only family picture would be lost.

M:  What do you think would happen if Mitt Romney became president?  Do you think he would bring back slavery?

Me:  What?? No, no, honey, that could never happen! What makes you think that?

M:  Well, there are a lot of white people you can't trust.

When I grow up I am going to be homeless, living on the streets without a wife and family.  Miserable--thinking about how bad you raised me!  I'm not a cute, innocent kid anymore!

You parents rate our movies.  And we just get to see sweet and kind movies.  That is why I am sick of parents.  Some of us want freedom to watch whatever we want.

Complaining that I changed my schedule at work, after I just said that some mom's have to work even longer hours, etc...

"We're not talking about that right now.  We are talking about you and your decisions!  You need to step up and take control, because you are responsible for your choices.  You just say no to me because I can't do anything to you, but you need to say no to adults too ..."

What would I do without a loving mother like you?

Some people don't believe in God.  They don't believe in Mother Nature.  They don't believe the earth will get hurt if you set a piece of trash on it.

Explaining how he felt left out, "They felt hard around me and cozy with each other."

Everybody knows the sun is invincible!

You are treating me like a little black slave boy!

You need to learn more about kids.  You need to learn that they are very, very, very sensitive.

After his fish died:

"I loved him will all my heart.  I'm glad I got to see him on his last day alive.  Now is he an angel.  He is probably protecting my other pets, because he was my pet.  He is helping them to survive."

Upset about losing a favorite toy:

"I would sacrifice my pillow, my bed, my closet, anything to get it back.  I would fight the best ninja master, I would battle a wolf, no matter if I die or succeed."

We need a lot of details to make it more interesting, because what does that attract?  Customers! And then if we are famous everyone could celebrate the day we made this book.

About a "bully" at school:

He is homicidal.  He wants to kill my feelings.  I want to crush him.  I want justice.

Think about what you have done!  You said two words, No and Not.  You are never to say those words.

You can tell how the earth is feeling, it tells you.  When it rains, those are his tears.  When it's sunny he is happy.  When it's cloudy, he is sad but he doesn't cry.  When there is lightning. he is sad, grumpy and really mad.  Snow is when he gets a toy or a present and it's snows with joy.  He has a joy feeling.

While telling me about the Ice Age, "Do I make you feel bad?  Like you're not smart?"

Listening to Michael Jackson song Billy Jean,  "Oh I get it, it's about girls and destiny."

Mommy, I just saw a glimpse of the main green and it's glorious!  You want to go there?

Mommy, I feel safe when I am with you.  You and Daddy are always standing by my side, protecting me.